Water’s natural flow and the flow of our emotions

“..Water, water everywhere…nor any drop to drink’ The Rime of the Ancient Mariner

Even though I have never read the poem, this quote keeps running through my head as I witness what is happening with water in the United States, especially here in Montana where clean water is one of our greatest most valuable resources. It reminds me of when I was in college at the University of Montana. I worked at Don Tripp’s Truck Stop (Its where I learned some of my best waitress skills) and an old guy would come in every day for coffee. He would come in at the quiet time of day so we got to talk and he told me over and over that I needed to go to Law School and study water law. He told me that in the future people would be fighting over water. I couldn’t imagine people fighting over water when I grew up surround by water. I have spent my life enjoying a plethora of mountain lakes and streams.

Now over 30 years later his words haunt me. I didn’t go into water law. I didn’t even go to law school like I had originally intended when I began studying at the University of Montana. Instead I studied Russian and Journalism and after getting told by my first editor that he wasn’t going to allow me to be a “muckraker,” I went back to doing what I was good at, serving people. I did learn to write but I have become so disillusioned with the systems in place now that the idea of a “free press” is preposterous. The idea that the press was the “Fourth Estate” and that it was supposed to keep the government honest is laughable. There is very little real journalism going on in the corporate media and so my only outlet seems to be on Facebook.

And it is now that here on a platform of social media that I am being called to report on the Water situation in Montana.

As you may or may not know, Montana has a long history of being corrupted by corporate interests and then waking up to the ruse and taking back our rights. This past year the City of Missoula has taken on Carlyle Corporation one of the largest investment firms in the world and Montana Law supported Missoula’s eminent domain claim to take back the water as a public resource. Since that time, there have been two proposed water bottling companies on the Flathead River and just yesterday one on Blackfoot land. Because I am no longer a journalist, I don’t have to just use humans as sources for my stories. Yesterday when I was in an airplane flying east over the Rocky Mountains, a beautiful, magnificent feminine presence came into my awareness.

She is the consciousness of the water that lies underneath the Rocky Mountains and she helped me understand the analogy of what is happening with water in the Rockies and more specifically here in our valley. She showed me that her consciousness erupts from deep within the earth and manifests itself as the thousands of streams, creeks, and lakes North into Canada and between the East Side of Glacier Park all of the way to the Salish Mountains, west of Whitefish. She erupts from the earth as fresh, clean water flowing down the slopes of mountains, mixing with the rain water and the melting water of the snow. She rushes joyfully from smaller creeks into larger streams and then finally into rivers such as the Two Medicine and Cut Bank Creek on the East Side and the 3 tributaries of the Flathead, as well as the Whitefish and Stillwater Rivers on the west side. As she travels through the valleys she picks up the energy of the people and the animals communicating upstream and down what is happening in the Flathead Basin on the West and the Missouri on the East.

My connection yesterday was more with the energy and facet of the water expressed in the Flathead basin. She went on to put what was happening in terms that I could understand.

In Chinese Medicine, at least according to the tradition I have studied, it is believed that at the moment of conception we decide what our purpose/destiny is going to be. Then our ancestors step forward to give us the gifts we are going to use to fulfill that purpose and then we are given the will, concentration focus to do it and then, finally we are given the chi or life force to fulfill our destiny. When we are born, that chi or life force is stored in our kidneys and we can access it in order to fulfill our destiny.

When we incarnate into human form, there is inevitably chaos. Many of us, in order to deal with the chaos begin misusing our will, trying to control and manipulate things and people in order to feel safe. Ultimately this is a misuse of our energy and will eventually deplete our inherited chi, that we are really only supposed to use to fulfill our purpose. The other thing that depletes us is when we aren’t able

to acquire chi through good, healthy, live food full of chi or through positive interactions with other people and through the life force that comes in with each breath.

Ultimately these attempts to control chaos divert us from our purpose and deplete our store of chi and life force and we get tired and often sick. The consciousness of the water that the earth gives us helped give me a different perspective on Lew Weaver, the man trying to open a bottling plant on the Egan Slough, which acts as the kidneys for Flathead Lake. Not only is he attempting to divert water from its destined path, he also intending to put more toxins into a river that is becoming more and more stressed from municipal and industrial waste.

Because of my spiritual path, I am always try to understand that everything is a reflection of something that is happening within me and that I have something personal to learn when outside circumstances “trigger my shit” as Lew Weaver’s plans certainly have. One of the things that I noticed from this attempt to bottle and sell of a resource that belongs to no one person, not even a corporation is how much RAGE I feel now towards corporate attempts to control water. Metaphysically water can be interpreted to mean spirit and emotions and from a Chinese Medicine Perspective water is associated with Fear and the Wisdom of our Ancestors.

The other thing I noticed was how exhausted I had become. I knew in the fall that I had overworked through the summer but I felt refreshed by January. However, something shifted as soon as the energy moved into spring. My menopausal symptoms increased, I became wrathful about things happening in the world and I couldn’t seem to get enough sleep. Luckily for me, my daughter had given me a gift certificate for some acupuncturist and I scheduled my session. Not surprisingly when she tested my pulses, my kidney pulses were very weak and she said I had a Liver Blood Deficiency.

Finally the Spirit of the Water made it clear to me that I was using my energy for something that was depleting my chi and diverting me from my destiny. She also felt there was something arising that involved ancestral concerns.

So just like Lew Weaver, trying to “steal water from the People,” something I was doing was stealing energy from my soul. And as my brilliant friend Jen said, I was most likely “bottling up some emotions like Lew Weaver wanted to “bottle up the water”.

As far as the Law of Oneness and Reflection is concerned I wonder if all of those of us who are Pissed about Lew trying to divert and bottle the water would be willing to look at what we have “bottled up”, how we are diverting our life force and distracting ourselves from our destiny, would Lew Weaver give up on his attempts to bottle the water and the other companies coming out of the woodwork to bottle and sell off the water that belongs to no one and yet everyone?

According to some, we are living in Destiny Triggering Times. Is my destiny tied to protecting the water? If so, are the water and the people best served by me fighting people like Lew or is my energy best used healing my “resource grabbing ego”? Or would my energy be better spent getting clearer about my purpose. At 53 I can’t afford to squander my energy or bottle my emotions. The power of my hormones is pushing me towards something. I guess I will surrender.

I wrote this on my way to my first week of Plant Spirit Medicine Training and to say that I had bottled up emotions was actually an understatement. As I learned more about the 5 Elements from Eliot Cowan I learned that in order to survive in this crazy culture, I learned to disassociate from my feelings to survive. Feelings, except for anger, were not very well tolerated in my family and as I am learning, in the culture in general. I had a fear at one point during my class that I wouldn’t be able to stop crying. I was crying about things I had only intellectually dealt with that rushed to the surface, like the water to move.

Of course it is very important that we stand up for the water in this valley, but we also have to stand up for all of the elements or like what is happening in other parts of this country or the world, the imbalances created my man will only lead to more suffering in the way of famines, droughts, starvation, cancers and ultimately mass extinctions of plants, animals and even humans.

The beautiful flow of the water, destined for the ocean and its dance back into our valley through rain and snow could be a memory we tell our grandchildren if we don’t all come together to restore the natural flow of nature. While we are working to restore the natural harmony in our outside world, it is equally important to restore the harmony of the 5 Elements in our inside world.



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Devil’s Club and Eco-Harvesting

If you saw my latest video, you saw me out in the woods talking about a plant that has been calling to me for a couple of years. I have studied plant medicine off and on since 1994 and through out my forays in the back of my mind, has always been an awareness of harvesting plants in a sustainable manner. The main reason for this was because of a book that wound up ion my hands in my plant medicine library. The book, “The EcoHerbalist’s Fieldbook” by Gregory Tilford is a great resource for wild crafting in Northwest Montana.
When we went to shoot this video I was very conscious of the fragile ecosystem in which these plants grow and I was even hesitant to mention the name of the plant because I didn’t want to create a stampede to harvest it. However because my videographer, Jen only gives me three minutes to say what I got to stay, I forgot to mention the importance of wildcrafting ethically. One of my local heroes brought it to my attention and reminded me of what happened to Echinacea at the time I was just getting into wildcrafting. A new species of Echinacea was almost if not completely wiped out because of this culture’s faddish obsession with the “latest, greatest, remedy.”
I am going to get back to The EcoHerbalist’s Fieldguide” and Gregory Tilford. He was a local herbalist that harvested herbs down the Swan Valley and his book was great in that it stressed how important it is that if we are going to seek our medicine locally via plants we have to do it in a way that guarantees the plants will be there into perpetuity as well as understanding that we aren’t the only creatures that use/eat plants.
When I harvest Devil’s Club I don’t ever take it from a place where there is only one patch. First of all, because the way its root system works, when you start pulling up the roots, you might, unintentionally disturb the whole patch as well as other plants around it. The second reason, is that wherever I have found it has been around water and from my communications with the plant it is there to protect the water source and I would not want to interefere in the plants spiritual role in the environment.
The other thing I would like to stress in harvesting sustainably is the importance of only taking what you need. I think sometimes when we begin wild crafting we get a little greedy and or afraid that there won’t be enough. if we are tuned into the lad and the plants, they will tell us how much to take and which plants to take. After a few years of harvesting plants, I stopped taking plants but continued to note where specific plants grow so that when I spirit calls me to harvest, I will know where they are. I also try to grow what I can myself, so I don’t have to take from the land. Luckily my family has been healthy and I haven’t needed to take much from the land.
This leads me to also introduce the notion of how important it is to not only harvest plants in a sustainable manner, but it is also important to harvest the plants in a sacred, grateful manner.
I never take a plant without offering to the plant and the land something in return. All of the traditions I have worked with have stressed the importance of honoring the spirit of the plant or the land with some sort of energy exchange. I have a little bag of “gifts” that I take whenever I go into the woods. In the bag I carry tobacco, corn, or sometimes I carry dried apple taken gratefully from my own trees. Before I take any herbs, I ask permission to take the plant, say a prayer of gratitude and often sing a song. At the very least when I have forgotten my bag, I will offer a song, a rock and have even resorted to giving my own hair as an offering.
I truly believe that the plant kingdom is here to support and nurture us and in return I want to respect, honor and nurture them. ROCK ON!

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The Rapist and The Warrior: Two Archeytpes showing themselves in the collective at this time

As a student of Archetypes and symbols, two major archetypes are up for me this week: The Rapist and The Warrior. The news has been full of stories about Rape. Namely there are a bunch of stories in the news about Bill Cosby and all the women coming forward who say he raped them and there are stories about Keystone XL Pipeline, Transcanda Corporation and Kinder Morgan in Burnaby, BC.  Both Bill Cosby and the companies represent the Rapist and the people who are standing up and speaking out against The Rapists are representative of The Warrior.

In the long run I think that The Rapist archetype is nudging the The Warrior Archetype awake. This week in some ways has been very intense for me as a result. Its been intense in mostly in a good, heart-expansive way as Chiron turns direct today, and is closer to my Chiron than it will be for another 50 years, the last gifts the Wounded Healer gives me before he walks away is to finally free me from the shame inflicted on me by my second run-in with The Rapist when I was nineteen and the contuing self-shaming that I inflicted on myself as a result.

Since I started reading about Bill Cosby’s actions at the beginning of the week I went through all of the emotions that many people have and my thoughts went from: “How could it be possible, he was such a funny guy…and the way he was calling black men to take responsiblity for their families?” Then as more and more women, some now in their 70s came forward with their stories I then went to the thoughts, “String the Bastard up.” And today as I read about the women who say they were raped by him, my thoughts went more to, “What if this story about Bill Cosby is more about giving the 2 out of 3 girls/women an opportunity to speak about being raped or molested and finally leg go of the shame that was inflicted by their perpertrators that they have been carrying around for decades. When I read about the waitress, the attorney, the journalist and the actresses who spoke of the trauma of being raped by powerful men and the resulting self-destroying coping mechanisms that were created to not feel the shame(such as drug addiction, alcoholism, promiscuity), I began to think that this thing that is happening in the collective is really about the opportunity for the countless thousands of women who have been sexually abused, harrased, molested and raped by men who had some power, whether strength or money, to freethemselves now. To no longer be quiet, to no longer be shamed because they put themselves in a vulnerable position with men who then took advantage of them. As women begin to do that it empowers other women and men who have been raped to speak up.

I know this may piss some women off but by the end of the week it didn’t seem to matter so much to me whether or not he did it, but what seemed more important on a collective level was that women were opening the door on closets that held deep, shaming painful memories. And by opening those doors and shining light on how they then perpetuated The Rapist pain on themselves, they opened the door on their inner Warrior. Many of the women in their 60s and 70s decided to speak in order to protect other women.

When I was nineteen, I was date-raped by a University of Montana Grizzly football player. Yeah that was in 1982 so that sort of thing has been going on for a long time. The difference between then and now is that at the time there was no term “date rape” I had to deal with it in the only way I could and for me the only way I could deal with it, besides immediately trying to scrub all of my skin off in the shower because I felt so dirty, was to immediately suppress it. I didn’t remember it for over 20 years but I started doing really self-destructive things. I started drinking a lot, became promiscuous and developed bulimea. I am guessing that anytime the shame and or memories would begin to surface I would do something that would explain why I had a reason to feel shame.

I think the only thing that truly saved my life and began my healing process was having my daughter when I was almost 29(Yeah I know, my Saturn return). She was an amazing gift and I had an astrologer friend when she was young tell me I could heal my karma or pass it on to my daughter so right then and there, I knew I had to begin a healing journey. I started to get right with my spirit and learned about Metaphysics and other ways to connect to Creator because my taste for church had been spoiled by being molested by a preacher(that’s another story).

And then I was doing a workshop where we were asked to write about a time in our lives we didn’t talk much about and I realized that I had no pictures of me from my college years. It was like I didn’t exist then and as I was writing about it the images of me in the shower trying to scrape my skin off came back to me and I remembered the whole struggle and the shame. Oh the shame. I was ashamed that I had been drinking and I was ashamed that I had put myself in that position and I was ashamed because I didn’t have the strength to face it at the time. Looking back now with the wisdom of age and the support of Chiron the Wounded Healer, I realized I handled it the best I could with the tools I had and with the collective view on rape, rapists and rape victims that continues to this day. I know better now about why I supressed it and still even if it happened today I don’t know if I would pursue charges because the system rapes you a second time when attorneys ask questions like, “Why didn’t you fight back?”,  Why didn’t you scream?” and “What were you wearing?”

As if telling a man, “No” isn’t enough. But because we live in Rapist Culture, it isn’t. We live in a culture where the Rapist Archetype is running the show.

We currently live in a culture that has on some level accepted that if a man has money, if a man has prestige, if man is a sports figure he can do what he wants to women, children and other men and the collective looks away. We currently live in a culture that these same men, with power and money can do whatever they want to the Earth. Both men and women seemed to be colluding with this abuse, this Rape, but in this last week I truly feel the tide is turning. Women, who have become powerful in their own right are speaking up about the trauma of being raped and the shame and powerlessness that is felt when you know that you will be further shamed by the press, the lawyers and other people. Warriors are rising within those who were raped. They are throwing off their powerlessness and their shame and standing and making their voices heard and they don’t care what the collective thinks.

This is happening as well with those native people who were basically raped by the U.S. and Canadian Governments and they are standing and singing their medicine songs for the Earth.I was touched in particular by the actions of a young man named Greg Grey Cloud. He is a Lakota and Dakota man who was in the United States Senate when they failed to pass the XL Keystone legislation that would allow the pipeline to be built through the United States. This young man sang a beauitful, powerful Honor song to honor the Senators who voted against the pipeline. He was arrested as a result and knew that that is what he was to do whether he got arrested or not. In an article I read he said:

“Why our org Wica Agli originally got involved in the opposition in the first place is because the KXL pipeline would bring the man camps. So, we know that statistically native women are perpetrated against far more than any other ethnicity in this country. One of every 3 native women are sexually assaulted. Eighty-six percent of the perpetrators are non-native. And because of jurisdictional issues, 100% of the time we can’t do a damn thing about it! In the small town of Watford city, ND located in the Bakken Oil Fields, the estimated sexual assault is increased by 70%!  Seventy percent! In our area TransCanada has proposed to station two man camps of 1,200 men per.  That’s a total of 2,400 non-native men accessing our reservation and potentially matching Watford City’s sexual assaults. I’ll be dammed if I allow that to happen in our community”
The words of this man are the words of a Warrior. Warriors traditionally were men and women who stood up and spoke up for those who were weak or small. Warriors are people who speak for those who can’t stand up or speak for themselves. Sometimes it is for women and children and men who don’t have the strength or the voice and always we need people to speak up for the Earth.

In Burnaby, British Columbia people are standing up to Kinder Morgan to keep a pipeline from being built on land that the First Nations never ceded to Canada. There were powerful women there singing their Woman’s Warrior Song.

It is time for all of us, to Stand up to and Call Out the Rapist whether it is Bill Cosby, Professional or College Athletes, Bank Presidents, Oil Companies such as TransCanada Corporation and Kinder Morgan, and sweatshops such as Walmart who are not only raping their workers, but the federal governement as well because of all of the employees being subsidised by the welfare system.

As Chiron moves direct today let the Centaur who was the mentor for Heros and Warriors guide you to the strenght of spirit within you to be The Warrior, protecting and speaking for your soul and those beings who can’t do it for themselves.

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Activating the Imaginal Cells

As you may or may not be aware the sign of Pisces is the sign most associated with imagination and in the next week the sun will move into this soulful sign. This sign follows the sign Aquarius and over last month with the sun in Aquarius I have gotten to learn and think about the gifts of Aquarius and how this sign prepares one for the Sun in Pisces. Now I am not an astrologer by any means but I am very interested in the heavens and how as the sun moves through the signs of the Zodiac we are given new opportunities to learn how that constellation can support us and empower us in the embodiment of our soul and the fulfillment of our spiritual purpose.
While the sun has been in Aquarius I have learned a lot about emotional and mental detachment. Through an amazing guy, Kate of Gaia I have learned about how important it is to stop taking the things that happen to me so literally and look more with emotional and mental detachment to see what I am creating in my life. When I was younger I was very literal. I believed everything everyone told me and I thought if it was in print it must be true. And I took life too seriously.
What I am beginning to play with now is the notion that we are playing this huge game of separation and all we have to do to shift the game to a game of connection is to look at things more symbolically and collectively. These two ways of looking at things seem to combine t he best of the Piscean and Aquarian minds. As someone who in western astrology is seen to have 4 planets in Pisces I feel very Piscean. But in Vedic Astrology I have four planets in Aquarius and therefore I think in a very Aquarian manner.
For me personally I see all of these things that have happened, both personally and collectively as an opportunity to begin the transition into the best Piscean-Aquarian that I possibly can be.
As an Aquarian I have a vision for myself, for my community and for the world. I know that my “mission” in this life is to be of service. In the past I looked at service being equated with suffering. That in order to be of service I had to make a sacrifice. That belief comes from an outdated Piscean age agenda. Now with a new Aquarian Age ideal I realize that when I am in my dharma, I don’t have to suffer. In fact when I am truly on my path of dharma, I will move into alignment with the Universe and everything I dream necessary to fulfill my dharma will manifest and this is where the gifts of my Piscean self will be helpful.
With the balanced compassion of my Aquarian mind and imaginative dreaminess of my Piscean heart, I am poised at this time to change my world.
I am poised to activate my Imaginal Cells. As I understand it Imaginal cells are the cells that allow a caterpillar to become a butterfly but I was first introduced to Imagninal cells by a Native American who told me that we had Imaginal cells in the back of the eyes that allow us to perceive other dimensions and to dream a new world. As I understand it these cells are tied to our DNA and allow us do many things when they are activated.
As a Piscean I see these imaginal cells very symbolically. I am not even sure if a scientist would find them on the back of the eyes, but I know there is something at the back of the eyes that is activated when we gaze at the Sun as it is rising and as it is setting. These cells are also tied to the activation of the Pineal gland and the ability to see the unseen realms.
A long time ago I heard about a conversation between a military man and Joan of Arc who heard the voice of Creator and here is the general gist of that conversation:
General: “How do you know that what you say is the voice of God isn’t just your imagination?”
Joan of Arc: “Don’t you know that God speaks to us through our imagination?”
This conversation truly spoke to me and helped me understand the importance of imagination and what our culture has done to squash our imagination.
However, we have a chance to remember and begin to utilize the gift of imagination and the whole Universe, including the stars, are assisting in this process.
While I was gazing at the Sun as it rose on the day of the Full Moon in Leo I got the sense that a new geometry of light was coming to the planet and I could see it in the light of morning sun and later in the moonlight.
As I perceived it, the geometry of light, when we allow it to penetrate the pupil will activate the Imaginal cells in a new way. These cells currently have only allowed us to “see the unseen”. This is a gift more and more people are unlocking,
However, with the new geometry not only is it unlocking this gift to see the unseen, but it is also actvating the sleeper strands of our DNA. The sleeper strands being activated by the new geometry will allow us to transform ourselves as well as our world.
Ancient traditions say that our mind is what has created the world and what many consider the nightmare we are living in. As these Imaginal cells are being activated we are being given the opportunity to dream something new as humanity awakens from the nightmare of disconnection from our Dharma and each other.
There are books written on how to do this practice of watching the sun set and rise. I haven’t read them so I am no expert by any means. You want to stop staring at the sun when it becomes too bright. You don’t want to burn your retina.
However, that small window of time when you can look at the sun, is powerful in the process of awakening.
Since I started the practice I have felt a new understanding of the way the energy from the center of the galaxy enters this solar system and then if we take the time, our bodies.
This specific geometry of light is triggering our Dharma. Dharma is our path of service. It is our purpose in incarnating at this time. The full moon in Leo activates our unique expression of Source. So over the next month or so allow your inner child to play, dream and imagine all of the cool fun ways to express yourself. It can be through writing, dancing, drawing, singing, cooking, acting, or crafting. Like a Renaissance Man you can express yourself through art, science, writing and yes, even thinking. Thinking out side the box.
As the sun moves into Pisces, start imagining and then implementing all of the cool ways to express yourself.
Let the light of the sun activate the imaginal cells in your eyes so that you can shape shift yourself into anything you want. You can also use the imagination and the imaginal cells to dream a new world as this old world crumbles. Dream big, imagine your role in the new world and the fun ways you can contribute to it!!!

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Traversing the Spine

I just returned from a week-long trip along the Continental Divide. I did so for a number of reasons, one of which was to be a chase truck driver for a motorcycle dual-sport tour. That was the physical reason, but I really get the sense there was a lot more than that to it.
The tone for the whole trip was set when I crossed the Continental Divide for the first time, just south of Butte, Montana. As soon as we crossed the divide I saw a herd of antelope and not more than a couple of minutes later, a herd of cattle being driven down a country road by cowboys. I entered the world of Cowboys, desolate places and sage brush and high plains. I grew up in Montana but have never considered myself cowgirl. My father was a railroader and I grew up in a timber/railroad town that eventually morphed into a resort town with a ski resort. I went to a Liberal Arts college in Missoula, a town full of liberal, open-minded environmentalists. I have been around cowboys, but it is a culture that I am far removed from.
Anyway as we traveled south along the East Side of the Divide we stopped in a little town, Dell, MT, at a restaurant called Calf-A. It is an old school house that has been converted into a restaurant where customers sit family-style at big tables. I ordered Turkey Pot Pie and was transported back to my grandmother’s kitchen. While we were waiting for lunch, a couple of ranchers sat down at the table beside us and they started talking “shop”. The one rancher started talking about Monsanto and Simplot (The Idaho potato Corporation) and how they controlled all of the seeds and potato starts and how because they were Genetically Modified Organisms, the Europeans wouldn’t buy them. He then went onto talk about how the ”Roundup Ready Plants” were attacking each other in the field and basically killing each other. When I first walked into this café I felt totally out of place. I am a tree hugging environmentalist liberal and a lot of Montanans outside of Missoula and Whitefish aren’t. But after hearing this rancher talk about GMOs and Monsanto I realized that this corporate greed thing may be one of the best things to happen to this country in a long time. “What?” you might be saying am I talking about?
Over the last couple of years I see how divided this country has become and how we can’t hardly have real conversations except with those who see the world exactly as we do. What I felt from listening to this rancher is that there is a great possibility that GMOs might what will bring people together, finally. This rancher will eventually be driven to speak up against GMOs for economic reasons while I speak up against them for health and moral reasons. It doesn’t matter why we speak up about this issue, its important that we find common ground and because we are humans and we need to eat, food is a fairly common ground.
I left Dell, Montana with Monsanto, Ranchers and food on my mind. By dinner time we were in Salt Lake and we stopped at a little diner. It was a totally different experience than the Calf-A. There were hippies all around me and there was vegan fare on the menu. I by this point was just observing the food that was being served and the energy of the people.
We camped outside of Moab, Utah and wandered into town for breakfast. The café had outdoor seating and was filled with outdoor enthusiasts. Bike riders, hikers and four-wheeler types filled the tables. The restaurant served a strong French Roast and fresh baked bread and pastries. It was the last good cup of coffee I was to have until we got to Durango, CO. at the end of the ride.
Anyway as we headed south I started to observe the correlation between economic vibrancy and quality of fresh food. By the end of the second day we got to Deming, New Mexico not far from the Mexican border. This is where we were going to start the ride from. We met the guys who had come from Georgia to do this ride. They were used to Southern Fried food and didn’t seem to notice the lack of romaine lettuce on the salad bar. The salad bar was loaded with salads rich with mayonnaise and pale head lettuce. A heard a study that was done with parrots and head lettuce. The parrots were just fed head lettuce and they died of starvation.
We got as close to the border as the Homeland Security Dept. would let us and we started heading north along a dirt road. Luckily I had brought a little food with me, because the place we had planned on having lunch was a trading post with microwave burritos. It was a dusty, windblown and run down store with the gas pumps shut down. I know this may sound kind of snooty, but I had become so conscious about the health and vibrancy of food that I got to a point where I would go hungry rather than eat food that was GMO and/or full of chemicals.
I sighed a breath of relief when we his Silver City, NM, the home of Billy the Kid. This was a good sized town but when we went downtown to find something for dinner a big portion of the downtown was borded up. I asked a young man on the street and he said there was just one place open that had any descent food and he pointed our way to Diane’s. We walk into this little restaurant, housed in a building from the 1870s and were pleasantly surprised. There was open-mike going on with a cowboy in a rhinestone tie and a belt singing his cowboy songs. The food was good. The salad was romaine at least, (I don’t think it was organic) and the food was fresh. I savored it.
We headed off into some beautiful, but isolated country. We crossed the Continental Divide a couple of times and traveled 120 miles on dirt roads to the only town with a hotel. We stayed in a little high-elevation town called Quemodo, NM. If you like greasy food, the food was good. The least greasy thing I found on the menu was chicken tacos. Again it was just head lettuce, wondered, how these people stayed alive. There was very little green stuff growing just a few trees but lots of sand and sagebrush. As I was travelling I realized that I when I was a kid this is the kind of food we ate, but my grandparents had a huge garden so we had tons of fresh greens and even ‘fresh frozen” veggies in the winter. It was about this time that I noticed that the restaurants that were opened still had furnishings from the 60s and it was then that I realized that a lot of these little towns were stuck in the past. Because they were stuck in the past, they weren’t changing and they weren’t growing. In fact, the opposite was happening. A lot of the little towns we went through were literally falling down.
It made me kind of sad. I could see that a lot of these towns had been prosperous at one time or another. They had been mining towns, cow towns and even to a certain extent, resort towns. But something was happening to them and they were dying. I could see where the soil had become sallinated from overgrazing their cattle and the dry, harsh conditions were hard to fight against. The people were doing the same things in the same ways that they had been doing them for over 100 years. But the rest of the world was moving on.
The other thing that I kept thinking about was this March Against Monsanto that was going to be held. I saw how our country has been hoodwinked by the big corporations and because of our belief in the system a whole section of the country is dying. While I was on my journey I dreamed about a star being. He looked like a Native American but he told me he wasn’t from this planet but that he had been helping the planet from time immemorial. He told me that I needed to look for a sign that the Star beings were here to help. Of course, I willingly waited for a sign. But you know how signs come in the least likely way that it took me a while to understand it was a sign. I was driving along in Navaho Country and I started thinking about “Kachinas.” I knew nothing about Kachinas but I suddenly knew I was supposed to have one. So I began to look for one. I saw a few but knew they weren’t the one I was supposed to have. Finally at the end of the trip, when we reached Durango, Co we walked downtown and I went into a store that had a bunch of Kachinas. I immediately was drawn to the ones with Buffalo horns. I couldn’t decide between the Dancing Buffalo Warrior or the kneeling Buffalo Warrior. I finally muscle-tested and chose Kneeling Buffalo Warrior dressed in Red and wearing Red Paint.
As soon as I got back to the hotel, I looked up what it meant and knew this was the sign from the Star Beings. Kachinas were beings that came from other worlds and the Kneeling Buffalo Warrior’s energetic role was to protect the Food Supply. I knew this Kachina has important work to do with me over the next few months. I know that this summer I am going to be working with crystals, crystal grids, water and points along the Spine and the Continental Divide. By working with these energies, I know I am supporting the earth and this country specifically in freeing itself from the control that companies such as Monsanto and Simplot have over our food supplies. I know that with the Help of this Warrior Kachina, I am working on an energetic level to shift the matrix around food. I am excited to see what happens.

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King Niall, St. Patrick and the broken vows of fealty: Part one-Rights of Kingship

Here I am sitting on a quiet St. Patrick’s day night thinking about my ancestors, especially my Irish ones. Especially the alcoholic ones. The ones who had no tools to deal with their emotional pain. As I think of that my mind moves back through time and space to an other time when the Irish had the tools to deal with their emotional pain and these tools were tied to their connection to the land and the Goddess.

As a I move back through time and space into my awareness comes an ancestor that I have only had an awareness of for a few years and his name is King Niall (who was the ancestor of the ruling O’Neil). I found when one of my shirttail cousins with a common ancestor, Domini Douglass, had his DNA tested. We had always thought of Domini as a son of a Scottish Lord but the DNA ended up showing that he was 100% Irish and a direct descendant of this Ancient Irish King, King Niall of the Nine Hostages.

Because of the stories told in my family, Domini was a hero to me and if I ever had a male child I intended to name him Domini. The story of his life is very interesting(That’s for another blog) but the fact that he is Irish instead of Scottish and that he was a descendant of one of the last Pagan Kings of Ireland was even more of interest to me. In researching King Niall, who reigned over Ireland at the end of the 4th Century to the beginning of the 5th Century, I found a tale that wet my appetite and triggered my ancestral DNA.

According to the tale, Niall was the son of King Eochaid Mugmedon and his second wife, Cairenn Chadsub, who was either of the daughter of a Saxon King or the King of Britain. Eochaids first wife was a jealous, bitter woman and in order to protect Niall from abuse Niall was given to a Druid Poet to raise. When the boy came of age, he returned to Tara to free his mother from oppression by the first wife. At about that time Eochaid was thinking about the future and wanted to know which of his sons would become King of Ireland when he went to the lands of his ancestors. The Druid Poet stepped forward with tests for the boys to see which boy would make a better king. The Poet came up with three different tests. These tests, unlike the patriarchal rights of kingship based on bloodlines and who could be the most devious, would have the sons show which lad was best suited for kingship.

The first test would test their ability to think under pressure  and respond to crises in a way that would support the land and its people. The second test would bring the blessing of God and the test would bring the blessing of the Goddess.

So even though the first wife didn’t like the idea of the tests because she wanted the kingship to go to one of her sons, all of the young men agreed to the challenge. So one day, while all of the sons were in visiting the blacksmith, the Druid-Blacksmith set his own forge on fire. As the fire burned swiftly all of the boys grabbed something to save. One of the brothers grabbed the beer. One of the brothers grabbed the firewood, one of the brothers grabbed the food and the other brother, in a panic fled the smithy’s in fear. Only Niall understood what was of value to the community and at great risk to himself he made two trips from the smithy’s: one carrying the bellows and a second trip to get the anvil. Thus saving the forge and the community from dire consequences.The blacksmith played a very important role in communities of the time. A village would struggle without their blacksmith. Hands down Niall showed his foresight and courage and thus he won the first round.

Time passed and the lads were given their second test. According to their beliefs at the time, the King answered to the Goddess and the earth and on one level became the “Consort of the Goddess”. In order to become the Consort , those seeking kingship were to hunt and kill the “White Stag” which was a physical representation of God who was the consort and protector of the Goddess and the land. By killing the deer the young man would also show that he was a skilled hunter and that his people wouldn’t go hungry. Also according to the Celts that stag represented the warrior spirit, the Sun and fertility as well as a medicine that would bring greater awareness of the worlds both seen and unseen realms.

So when the lads were told of their second task they all approached it in line with their characters. One of the brothers got drunk and fell asleep. One of the brother’s made so much noise he scared all of the animal life away, one of the brothers, because of his love of food was fat and out of shape and after walking for a short while got tired and took another nap. The other brother, who fled the forge, was so afraid of being out in the woods by himself, that he ran back to the castle and hid under his bed. Only Niall approached the challenge with forethought. He went to his favorite place in the woods, sat down and meditated on where the stag would be. He prayed for guidance from the Consort of the Goddess and asked humbly for help. In his minds eye he saw where the stag would be waiting for him and with an offering of promising that one of his sons would become a Druid, Niall and the stag agreed on a time and place that the stag would offer himself. At the appointed time and at the appointed place Niall saw the stag and thanked the stag for offering himself. With  precise aim, Niall shot stag through the neck with an obsidian arrow. The stag fell to his knees and Niall approached the dying animal with reverence and put it out of its misery.That night a feast was held and everyone in the village shared the stag. Niall ate the heart as a way of honoring the courage and soul of the deer as well as acceptance of the other gifts of the stag.

Thus with Niall’s success, it wasn’t looking very good for the son’s of the first wife and so she sought to sabotage the process. However, the Druids were onto her and kept her busy so she couldn’t interfere. And so the third test was revealed. The final test of Kingship was that the lads had to seek out the Sacred Well near Tara and drink from the well and bring some back for the people of the kingdom. There are Sacred Wells in all of the British Isles and the water from these wells were believed to have healing qualities as well as bestow life health and abundance upon those who drank the water. The caveat was that all of these wells were guarded by a Hag or other intimidating spirit.

So the young men sought the well and the meeting with the Hag. At long last they reached the location of the Sacred Well. They hid out of sight of the Hag and argued about who would go first and so Niall suggested they pull sticks and those with the shortest sticks would go first. The one who was afraid of everything drew the shortest stick and in great relief the brother with the alcohol problems took a big swig off of his goatskin bag of beer. With great trepidation the scardy-cat brother crawled out of the bushes and scrambled towards the well and the Hag that guarded the well. When he got within about ten feet of her, she smiled a wrinkled toothless grin, pointed her finger at him and wiggled it summoning him to come closer. With a scream of terror he ran in the opposite direction. In the meantime the lads in the bushes compared their sticks together. The brother with the next shortest stick was the overweight brother. He lumbered towards the well with little fear. He wanted to get this over with because he was hungry and tired. When he got to the well, he asked very politely for some water from the well. The Hag told him she would give him all the water he wanted if he would only kiss her. The smell of her and the look of her teeth was almost ruining his appetite and he felt it wasn’t worth the risk of spoiling his next meal. And so with a gracious apology he declined and headed back home, at a quick pace for him, so he wouldn’t miss dinner.

After this exchange between their brother the two remaining brothers compared their sticks.Niall had the biggest stick so the other brother was obligated to go next. After hearing the Hag demand a kiss from his brother,he had drained his goatbag of beer and thus was unsteady.  Nevertheless, he carefully struggled to his feet and stumbled towards the well. When he politely, with slurred speech asked the Hag for some Sacred Water, she politely told him she would give him all the water he wanted if he would kiss her. He pondered it for a moment and then said, “I am drunk, but not that drunk.” With out any further comments he turned on his heels and headed home.

As Niall quietly sat watching his brothers’ attempts to obtain the sacred water,he contemplated the Hag. She was ugly and she was old, he thought, but no matter she was an aspect of the Goddess and therefore someone worthy of a kiss, if not love. So he stood up, put his shoulders back,opened his heart and marched towards her struggling to see the Goddess in her. When he was near to her,he stated his request for the Sacred Water and she in kind asked for a kiss. He told her he would be delighted but that he would have to close his eyes. Her response to him was to pucker up her wrinkly lips and lean towards him expectantly. He closed his eyes and leaned towards her, touching his lips to her. He had been hoping that a quick peck would be all that would be required, but she grabbed him and pulled him towards her. As his lips touched hers, electricity shot through him and his desire for her was ignited. He kept his eyes closed and felt his way and with passion and desire they made love. After the fact he opened his eyes and saw within his arms a beautiful maiden. He pulled back in surprise and she introduced herself as Sovereignty,a representative of the Goddess and by not only kissing her but by coming into sacred relationship with her, she would bless his Kingship thus assuring health, long life and abundance on him and his people. However, there was one caveat. In order to have full blessing of the Goddess he was required to vow Fealty to the Goddess. In doing so he was promising, under sacred oath that he would protect the land, the women and the children and in exchange, he, his descendants and the Irish would always have their physical needs taken care of. In other words they would never go hungry. Without hesitation, Niall consented to the vows of Fealty to the Goddess and a sacred Contract was made.

Niall returned to the King with the water from the sacred well and the King felt peace knowing his country and his people would be in good hands. And when it was time for him to pass to the land of his ancestors he gratefully passed on the Mantle of Kingship to his son Niall.

Stay tuned for the Second Part of the Story: King Niall gets hooked on power and kidnaps the wrong Brit

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Chiron Return:A Heroes’ Journey back to Self, Part II

With Chiron still putting pressure on my natal Chiron another beautiful Chironic healing came today. As I posted yesterday, I learned that because my Chiron is at 10 degrees Pisces in the third house of communication, as I understand it, it is most likely that my woundis would hinder my ability to connect to the Divine as well as hinder my ability to communicate my spiritual knowings.

I have a group of apprentices whom I have been teaching reflexology and acupressure. When I teach about the acupressure points,I combine the physical with the psychospiritual. Because there is an odd number of students in my class, one of the students had to work on me today. Earlier in the class we had talked about Chiron and what I learned from my astrology session yesterday and we were all looking at our Chirons and what our major wounds were. When the woman put her hand on  the occipital bone on both sides of the spine. I started feeling all of this energy and all of this pressure in my pelvis and at the bridge of my nose. It was weird but because I have trust in the process, I just watched it. After a while, the women told me she felt that the pulses had balanced but that her hands were moving through the bone of my skull into my brain and that she felt like she needed to pull her fingers out slowly. I told her to trust her knowing and do what she was called to do. As she was pulling them out, she said that she felt like two metal rods had magnetized to her fingers and that that was what she was pulling them out of my brain. And strangely enough, as she was pulling them come out, I could see and feel them. It felt like they had been pushed into my brain through the back of the skull and shoved up at an angle where they crossed and then hovered at the bridge of my nose.

I could feel her pulling them out slowly and I felt a huge release of energy and emotion. I cried and sobbed.Then I started seeing these flashing images of what it was all about. Just so you know I am a Pisces. I have my sun, my moon, my Chiron and my Jupiter in Pisces. That is a lot of dreamy, magical Neptunian energy. I receive these stories that may be true but may also be just symbolic. With these stories that I have received,I don’t see them as the gospel, just as teaching tools for myself and others.

Anyway, back to the story. So I see myself as a little baby. I am sitting on the floor of my grandparents house facing the television. The images on the t.v. are black and white and with my adult mind, I see that we are watching a funeral procession.With some part of my  mind, I understand that it is the funeral of John F. Kennedy. How can that be, I am only 10 months old? To my little child self the funeral wasn’t what grabbed my attention. What I was, as an infant, feeling was the intense pain of my parents and my grandparents and my parents. It is as if hope left the room.

I had this memory a year or so ago and in talking to a few people about it, it felt to me that because of the death of JFK a new timeline was created. I felt like, for me personally, I had come in with a lot of spiritual gifts, but with his death I wasn’t going to be able to use them as my soul had intended. As a result of the new timeline a whole generation of children had to be shut down. Their gifts had to be shut down.

What I saw today was that beings, whether of this dimension or another, came and inserted these metallic rods into my brain to shut down my pineal and my third eye. The gal who pulled the rods out said, “it must have hurt”. and I think this is probably when I first start “forgetting” painful experiences. I think she was right. I think it did hurt. However, I get this sense that on a spiritual level it kept me from suffering a different kind of pain. I got very strongly that had this “shutdown” not occured, I may have been institutionalized because of the things I saw and knew. At ten months(notice the 10,like my 10 degrees Chiron) I was preverbal. I wasn’t talking yet. If I was clairaudient,clairvoyant, and clairsentient, like I think I was, my gifts would most likely have been interpreted as insanity. Yesterday the astrologer asked me if I was afraid whether people would think I was crazy or lying in regards to being molested by the preacher, I said no. I think the insanity issue relates to this event. When JFK died, the Powers That Be, created a new timeline that pushed this evolution and revolution of humanity back about 50 years. With the removal of these rods and the release of any fear of being considered crazy, I know it is time for me to fully utilize my spiritual gifts in service to the Divine Plan. I know it is time now for humans to remember they are sovereign, spiritual beings. By sharing my Heroes’ Journey back to Self and to the Divine,I give people permission to seek the truth of who they are.

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